I update and feel like an attention whore--but hello anyone with a semi-public diary wants some kind of attention.
I am at a serious cross roads...Physically I am doing better, not purging so much, no drugs, less drinking. Mentally, I feel challenged in a good way.
Emotionally, I am a mess. i feel i am coming close to a break through. But it is too much. having people know me. Having myself know me...how fucked up is that? I am scared of finding myself.
Right now I am freaked out because I accidentally bought a fucking gallon (or 2 who the fuck knows) of whiskey. I wanted a bottle from the delivery place. But I bought 51$ worth of whiskey!!! (and 2 diet cokes) Ugh my laziness cost me a lot today. I did not want that much and had no idea. So I have alcohol for quite a while now. Boooo. At least I budgeted for it kind of.
I need a break for a while. I need to put my thoughts on paper without people who kind of know me seeing them. I am not ready for people in my real life to know how fucked up I am.
Will be back in a few days, weeks, months maybe.
3:20 p.m. - 2011-05-28
Recent entries:
- - 2016-03-14
Still alive - 2016-02-14
- - 2015-11-05
- - 2015-10-02
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