Someone has at least viewed one of the resumes I sent out this morning. I got a message from LinkedIn. They may not contact me but it makes me happy to see things happening. I have been working on expanding my network. I will work on giving some recommendations and endorsements tonight in hopes that I get a few more of my own.
I am mentally ready to move on. No one, not even my most annoying coworkers, deserves to be insulted and belittled at work constantly and told that they are 1) aggressive 2) moody 3) oversensitive 4) defensive 5) have a bad attitude. This is in the same breath as being told that I have low self-esteem and I don't realize how much I am valued. And it's not his fault he never tells me because his dad was mean. Yet he is happy to tell his favorite employee how wonderful she is every chance he gets AND tells her in front of everyone else so we all know how super awesome and magical she is. He insults me in front of everyone else and is sure to tell people I am not doing a good enough job with social media or with whatever other shit he gives me.
He also talks shit about me behind my back to my coworkers and employees. And in front of them too. I bring up relevant points, that he doesn't like the topics we chose and we discussed him giving us some topics he approved but he has been busy lately (he was out of town) so we picked on. He said it was obvious my employee had put words in my mouth (he didn't, WTF) and I said no, they were my impressions. He then said I didn't know what I was talking about because I wasn't part of the meeting. Ummm fuck you, you piece of shit. I said fine. Then later I said, I don't need to be involved, it's fine and he got mad at me (as usual) and said I am supposed to be involved (so why have meetings without me and insult me when I bring up my opinion?)
Nothing I say or do at this point is OK. I can't be tired (moody, rude). I can't be quiet (moody). I can't be loud (aggressive). I can't state my opinion (I am not part of the conversation so why am I talking?) I can't NOT say anything (I am supposed to be responsible for this so why am I not working on it? Why is it failing? Why aren't I doing better?)
I can't win!
I cannot wait to take time off and relax. I cannot even deal with this shit any more. I am focused on getting a new and better job, paying down my debt, getting healthy/in shape, meeting new people, and expanding my mind. None of those things involve being treated like shit every day.
So far I haven't cried once today! It's still early but I cried 4 times yesterday so I think it's a win compared to that.
12:10 p.m. - 2014-03-26
Recent entries:
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Still alive - 2016-02-14
- - 2015-11-05
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