I wish I was mysterious and interesting. I am too open, too loud, and too crazy to be alluring. I'm bad at hiding my feelings or not crying or yelling or not being uncouth. I cringe when I think about what others must think of me.
I am so damn hungry. Exercise has kick started my metabolism again. I smoked a cigarette today. I can now easily go weeks without one. I had one because I was bored and my coworker offered me one. I feel bad but I have been doing well.
I need diet pills or something.
I oddly long for human companionship but also loathe it and run from it. I want to be around people who let me talk and want to know about my life and aren't selfish twits. I want someone who thinks I am smart and witty and worth knowing and loving.
For now I am happy with my cat and my wine and an excellent book. I read a few books a week, which is terrible because I refuse to go to the library. I love owning books and I reread them constantly. I have a book in my bag, one or two in the bathroom (I read in the tub people) and one in the living room. I read different books all the time. My brain needs to be active and slightly distracted to work properly.
I am so fucking weird.
3:19 p.m. - 2011-05-06
Recent entries:
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Still alive - 2016-02-14
- - 2015-11-05
- - 2015-10-02
- - 2015-09-09
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