I feel like right now I have nothing to look forward to but more bad times at work and more bad times at school. There are so many things that I have been waiting to have happen (good things like acceptance to NYU, my school refund, my debt shrinking) and I'm just in limbo. Every day I get up to face more bullshit. I feel terrible. I am so depressed.
I didn't work out today because I was/am exhausted. The weeks of sleepless nights has caught up to me and I could barely drag myself out of bed.
I am seriously wondering where my life is going. I feel so trapped right now and overwhelmed. But I know if I give up for one day, it will turn in to two, then three and I will have to dig myself out of a hole again.
So today I will work on my homework, do proposal stuff, stay as late as I need to, and then go to the library. I will copy the models for class then walk home for some exercise. I will do wither 20 minutes of Pilates or yoga then watch TV and do more homework. I will make today a success.
And if I don't get into NYU I will still have tons of money saved. I can pay off most of my debt and apply to other schools in NYC. I can do this.
10:40 a.m. - 2011-03-16
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