So duh little Raygirl aka Rachel is drinking tonight, as she does every night. But the vanity and self hatred that fuels this ED will make me stop drinking and start working out again.
My drunkenness is making me long for my nasty coworker again. But I've been good; deleted his number ages ago and stashed it someplace far. I see Omar tomorrow but he is not filling that void (heeeyoooo. "Fillin' the void" gross sorry).
Watching the Spurs, hopefully win tonight (oh God I typed "win" as "wine"). I tried to go to the library but it closes at 6 PM on Fridays. What the fuck? I'll be back tomorrow morning before the bus to Austin.
I'm pushing myself to not give up. It's hard when sleep is so close.
Tonight 1 liter of wine and one shot so far. I can do at least 3 or 4 more before I pass out. I'll try to still with 2 more. It's almost 10 PM. I guess I need to buy more alcohol for my trip tomorrow. I don't mind so much. It makes the tummy pain stop. I need that pain to stop more than anything.
9:30 p.m. - 2011-02-25
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