So in an odd good/bad mood right now.
Things with K continue to deteriorate. I am so bitter about how cruel he has been to me in the past I am now lashing out at him at every chance. I reached out to him about my drug, alcohol and ED problems and he ignored me. I think I'm finally done. I rejoined match.com to get some new blood in my life. I think i got more matches the last time though. Perhaps I am being to hasty. It has been less than 24 hours.
I worked out 3 times today and hope to keep that schedule up for at least the next month. I am disgusted with myself. Too many dumb guys saying that I look good with meat on my bones. These bones were made to hold muscle, skin, and air. Nothing more.
I have been taking St. John's Wort. It seems to help. i feel less lazy which is one of the biggest side effects of my depression. Let's hope I can keep it up.
I haven't had sex since like November. This is unacceptable. Now I have to find a new guy to fuck since K is being a fucking douche right now. I know that part of it is that he thinks I am more attractive than him. Which I am. It makes him mean and cranky. Whatever. The sex wasn't that good anyway.
8:03 p.m. - 2008-01-07
Recent entries:
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