So yall know about that dude I;ve been fucking? The one I swore I wouldn;t get attached to cause I don;t do that shit, and I know better and I just can't do it? So yeah of course I got attached and today I got slapped in the fucking face for it.
I showed up at his house cause my friend is seeing his roommate and wanted to go over. I walk in and he is kneeling in front of some girl all sweet like. He says "this is awkward" They preoceed to cuddle and hold hands in front of me and just fucking make me sick.
The worst part is he just met her recently. SO while hes been booty calling me he met a girl worth being nice to and cuddling with, when that piece of shit wont even stay over at my house. He tells me not to get comfortable. He says we clicked liek he hasn;t lciked with a girl in a long time. He lies to my fuckign face. He says if he had know I would be over he wouldn't have had her there. He says shes not his girlfriend. We laugh about her trying to kick my ass. I want to hurt something. someone. meyself...
Why am I NEVER good enough for anything but sex. I mean, I like sex but son of a bitch. If I am so "fun" and "smart" and "funny" and great then why the fuck am I always alone?
They looked so happy together. Like a real couple. She is the opposite of me. Short with big tits, long hair Hispanic. He claims "big tits are over rated" " I really only like Black chicks" which, umm ok thats cool I guess. I am numb right now. This has been a shitty week. One week ago I had a place to live and I guy I though actually liked me. Now I have jack shit and I am lookign forward to working 16 hour days for no fucking overtime. I thought life was supposed to be easier than this.
10:23 p.m. - 2005-06-06
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