i'm still alive. here in el paso for the week. my moms computer is so fucking slow that this is the first time ive even attempted to use it. i go back to the city on sunday. ive purged once since ive been here, no big deal really. i hooked up with 3 guys and fucked on of them. hottest guy ever. everyone i know is very jealous. slef esteem boost to say the least. sadly all 3 of these guys have girlfriends. i didnt know this until afterwards with the first guy (jaime)i only made out with him at least. the second guy (george) i knew had a girlfriend but i was so drunk that i didnt completely realize that he was the guy i took home with me. the sex was great i must say but i feel like a whore. he broke up with her the next day because shes a bitch. she was at the party whewre we met and left him there to find his own ride cause they had a fight. so i had little to do with their breakup i think. the third guy i hooked up (omar)with was another dude i had met at that same party. he liked me and i was going to hook up with him then but he had to take his girlfriend home (didnt know that at the time though he said he had to drop off a friend and that he'd be back.)yeah well while he was gone my friends and i left and took george the hot guy with us. so last night we go to a bar and who is there but omar. he is wasted. he keeps tryign to make out with me and he is pissed thta i left the party. he drags me to the bathroom to make out and im like ummm ok. but then i was like no you have a girlfriend. i was quite drunk myself. then we all went back to his place and he takes me to his room and starts taking off his clothes. hes liek take off oyur clothes lets have sex. i said nope you have a grilfriend. we made out a bit and he offered to go down on me which i would never turn down (bad i no, dammit) but as soon as he started he jumped on me and tried ot shove his dick in. ummm nope. i put my pants on and left and told him to go to sleep and call hims girlfriend in the morning. ugh. if i had been sober i would never have hooked up with any of them. i dont want to fuck up any ones relationship. that is asking for bad karma. but at leats i feel better about myself event hough i am fatter than ever.
7:42 p.m. - 2003-12-19
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